They say that we travel the world to search for what we need, only to come back home and find it. After a long time away I came to visit what I used to call home. It’s the place where I was born and where I grew up. The place that fostered me but which I outgrew as my wings developed.
My timeline starts in the small town of Slobozia. It’s located in the South-East of Romania, the flat part of the country which is mainly covered in crop fields. Argiculture is the fuel that keeps this little town going. Asside from that and a few pubs there’s nothing much to do arround here. It’s a pretty quiet place, were everyone knows everyone and where nothing ever happens. Or at least it’s how I remember it now…
My parrents divorced when I was young shortly after my mother went to work abroad. I lived with my father until I was fourteen after which I decided to move to Spain and live with my mother. I resided there for two years, in Coslada a small city located only ten mins away of Madrid. Still a small and chill town but with a lot more posibilities than Slobozia.
One summer break when I came to visit my home town, I fell in love with a girl. So much so that I decided to return to my brithplace after two years of living in Spain. My mother was curshed. I didn’t care, I was in love. Shortly after I moved back, I found out that my inamorata was cheeting on me. I was crushed. She didn’t care, she was in love. My revolution was for nothing. Here I was in this boring little town again, feeling more and more like a stranger.
The following year (and a half) I finished highschool and moved to Bucharest to study. My university path did not last long as I dropped out in my second year. I then got a job and shotly after I started my first mature relationship. That marked a moment of profound tranformation, a sort of remembering of who I really was. I started walking that path almost seven years ago and I’m still walking. I’m still discovering myself, still pealing off ego layers.
Last summer we moved to Utrecht, a very pitoresque town found in the rainy lands of The Netherlands. Change brings change and after six years of being together, me and my better half deicded to stop being a couple. We lost each other but found ourselves again as borther and sister.
Like any mango person it did not take me too long to fall in love again. It took me even less to crush and get crushed in return. I’m the optimist, I get burned and heal fast. I don’t look back and I’m allways up for finding the next big thing. Not this time. Not anymore. I wanted to continue my path but lost all frame of reference. Same as any lost person would do, I started drawing maps in the sand figuring out directions for myself.
There’s so many places I want to go. There’s so many experiences I want to taste. Wait. Do I? Really? Not that much. Only after losing everyting I realzied that I don’t want anything anymore. I never wanted it to begin with. The only place I ever wanted to go, was home. Although I had many places I called home, lived in multiple families, I never was home. All this adventrue seeking and soul searching was that of a kid trying to find his way.
Home is not where I was born nor where I grew up. Home is not where I’m living now nor where I want to go next…
Home is where my heart is, so I come to you.
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